Grieve With God
This devotional considers Job 2:7-3:10.
I’ll begin today with a reading from Job…
7 So Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. 8 Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes.
9 His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”
10 He replied, “You are talking like a foolish[a] woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”
In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.
11 When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. 12 When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. 13 Then they sat on the groundwith him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.
Job Speaks
3 After this, Job opened his mouth and cursed the day of his birth. 2 He said:
3 “May the day of my birth perish,
and the night that said, ‘A boy is conceived!’
4 That day—may it turn to darkness;
may God above not care about it;
may no light shine on it.
5 May gloom and utter darkness claim it once more;
may a cloud settle over it;
may blackness overwhelm it.
6 That night—may thick darkness seize it;
may it not be included among the days of the year
nor be entered in any of the months.
7 May that night be barren;
may no shout of joy be heard in it.
8 May those who curse days[b] curse that day,
those who are ready to rouse Leviathan.
9 May its morning stars become dark;
may it wait for daylight in vain
and not see the first rays of dawn,
10 for it did not shut the doors of the womb on me
to hide trouble from my eyes.
At this point in Job’s life, through a series of horrible events, he had lost his oxen, donkeys, sheep, camel and his servants were killed. All his children were killed. Then, he was afflicted with a horrible skin disease. One after another, after another, after another…
There’s much to say about the account of Job’s loss. However, I want to focus on 3 responses to grief that we can learn from, and venture to consider in our own lives. The first is Job’s wife’s response. I want to be hard on her. How could she say such a thing? But all her children were also dead. And if we know anything about being a homemaker, the success of the husband is also the woman’s glory because he wouldn’t be able to do it all without her. Her husband was right, though. She was talking like a foolish woman, like a woman who didn’t know God. Grief does that to you, though—forces you to question everything that was once stable and true, like our assurances about God.
The second response I want to highlight is that of Job’s friends. They heard about their friend’s grief and made plans together to go and grieve with him. They wept aloud, then sat in silence with him for seven days. As normal as death and suffering is, most times we don’t know what to do or say. Here, though, is an example of what it looks like to come alongside someone who is in sorrow. As Christians, we are taught to mourn with those who mourn—to grieve in community. How can we as communities of faith sit with those who have lost loved ones in this pandemic, or for any other reason?
The third response is Job’s. When he was able, he opened his mouth and let out raw contempt for his birth. When all the fruitfulness of your life comes to ruin and dies, hope and desire for life is often taken as well. When we find ourselves in these dark places, be brave and acknowledge it as Job did. He voiced his faith in words to his wife, not so much as praise to God, but as an expression of his fear of the Lord when he said, Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble? This man had the kind of relationship with God that allowed him to openly surrender both life and death to God. He didn’t seek God in times of favor, and hide from him in sorrow. He was able to express his grief within the context of his relationship with God.
My encouragement today is to be brave and find the words to express your grief. Ask the Lord for help, even in this. And if you’re okay today, ask how you can come alongside someone who is grieving. It may not look like what Job’s friends did, it may be a text or a meal. Whatever your response, know that God is present in all things that concern us. Psalm 139 says even darkness is as light to God. So, even though we may feel obscured by all around us, and we may not know where God is or even who God is anymore, there is nothing veiling God’s vision of us. He is faithful. Trust him to take you through.
Amen.